Play the Role.

You might feel silly practicing conversations you may have with your kids, but it's helpful to think through possible scenarios and what you would say. While every situation and every family is different, the following may be used as a guide to help you address certain questions your children may ask.

Did you drink when you were my age?

"What I did when I was your age really doesn't have anything to do with the choices you need to make now. If I tell you I drank, you might think that gives you permission to try it. If I tell you I didn’t drink, you might think I don't understand what you're going through. None of that matters. What matters is that I love you and worry about you. I really don't want you to drink alcohol until you are at least 21, because it's the safest, healthiest choice you can make."

"I don’t want you to make the same mistakes I did. Now, we know a lot more about how alcohol affects young brains and how dangerous it is. If someone had told me what I’m telling you when I was younger, I would have made smarter decisions."

"No, I didn’t drink as a teenager because I wanted to..."

• Make sure I did something with my life
• Not end up like some of the other kids in my neighborhood
• Make sure I became a person my parents could be proud of

But, you (brother, sister, cousin, aunt, uncle, friend, etc.) drink…

"It really is different for adults. For one thing, it’s illegal for people under 21 to drink. More importantly, it affects teen brains differently than adults and can even cause permanent damage. Teens who drink are also more likely to become alcoholics later on, do worse in school and sometimes make mistakes they’ll regret for the rest of their lives. I love you and don’t want anything bad to happen to you."

But, everybody’s doing it…

"I did a little research and found out that most Hawaii teens aren’t drinking. You may think most teens are drinking, but it’s not true. You only notice the kids who drink because things that are different or wrong tend to stand out. And what you see on TV or in the movies is unrealistic. If teens drank like that, they would have more accidents, end up in jail and most of them would flunk out of school."

What do I say if my friends ask me if I want a drink?

"Sometimes it’s hard to say no to a friend. So, why don’t we practice some different ways so that you can be comfortable making your own choices while still being a good friend."